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Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Joan Leslie Rawson (Nee Godwin) R I P

Joan, I didn’t think your leaving would matter at all.
It’s been so long since we last communicated.
You were always there, in the back of my mind
… a distant someone that I never tried to touch or talk to.
And now I can’t, because you left, I doubt it was voluntary.
The last time you made me cry was just before we separated.
After 30 years together, yeah … I shed some tears.

But last night was different, our son made me cry, but it was your fault.
He told me you had left, and I was totally unprepared for that.
I imagined you always being “there”, not just a memory, but something tangible,
Now …and too late as always … I realise I should have tried to retain your friendship.
I can’t explain this feeling … it’s not like I am going to miss you, it’s just …
a vast emptiness that opened up to absorb the tears Mike and I shed together,
an engagement of images churned from within my shocked brain cells and
damn it - sorrow, loss, confusion, sadness – I can’t explain it?!

However, I have to say goodbye, albeit from a distance.
No kiss on your forehead, no gentle press of your folded hands
I fell out of love, but never disliked you, so from me to you
“Bye for now … Rest in peace sweetheart”

2015 01 12

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